I love vintage ads. They certainly didn’t beat around the bush back then. They told you, in very frank and explicit terms, why you needed to buy this product — you were too fat, you were too ugly, you were single!
In these times of subliminal messaging, where the misogyny behind an ad is hidden in subtext and “art”, it’s kind of refreshing to look at advertising from yesteryear. At least they told you what was wrong with you - to your face.
So when someone asks me, “Why are you single?”, I can choose from many possible reasons, thanks to vintage advertising.
1. I smell.
2. I‘m constipated.
3. I‘m smart.
4. I smell.
You speak the truth Bön-Bön, nothing turns me off a hot girl than finding out she doesn’t consume enough bran. That’s why I start every date asking “are you often constipated?”