Cast Away!

Share

UPDATE (Feb. 11): After some re­flec­tion and in­put from friends, I’ve changed my choice of Tina Fey to Tatiana Maslany for the role of Robyn Doolittle. As much as I love Fey, she is con­sid­er­ably older than Doolittle. And Maslany does kick ass on Orphan Black.

The film rights to Robyn Doolittle’s ex­posé of Rob Ford, Crazy Town, were snapped up re­cently, prompt­ing a guess­ing game on so­cial me­dia as to who would be cast in the adap­ta­tion. As I read the book I’m start­ing to as­sem­ble my own dream cast for the soon-to-be CBC minis­eries, Crazy Town: The Rob Ford Story, spon­sored by Iceberg Vodka, Steak Queen and cocaine.

Rob Ford: This guy - Larry Joe Campbell

Doug Ford: If we can’t get Chris Farley to play RoFo, we can at least get his brother, Kevin, to play Dougie.

Mama Ford: Elaine Stritch

Kathy Ford: Kathy Kinney (Mimi) from The Drew Carey Show

Randy Ford: Gary Busey

Renata Ford: A non-speaking, non­de­script back­ground extra

Doug Ford, Sr.: Gordon Pinsent

Sandro Lisi: Jeremy Piven

Chief Bill Blair: John Lithgow

Det. Sgt. Gary Giroux: Nick Offerman

Robyn Doolittle: Tina Fey Tatiana Maslany

Daniel Dale: Daniel Brühl

Nick Kouvalis: John Oates from Hall and Oates

Mark Towhey: Toby Jones

Frances Nunziata: Elizabeth Peña

Denzil Minnan-Wong: David Wain

Norm Kelly: Dean Stockwell

Dennis Morris (Ford’s Hotmail lawyer): Ed Asner

Mohamed Farah: Barkhad Abdi

Fabio Basso: John Travolta

Dave Price: Danny McBride

George Mammolitti: Vincent D’Onofrio

Jerry Agyemang: Morris Chestnut

John Tory: Stephen Colbert

Conrad Black: Michael Gambon

Don Cherry: Don Rickles

And Sam Elliott as The Narrator

Who would you cast?


Share

2 Comments on Cast Away!

  1. Leon
    February 11, 2014 at 12:29 pm (3 years ago)

    You didn’t cast Tom Sizemore as Robbo?

    Bonnie, I am disappoint.

    Reply
    • Bonnie Dean
      February 11, 2014 at 3:36 pm (3 years ago)

      Tom Sizemore? Really? Nah — he would have made a good Mammolitti, though. But I don’t think he’s in work­ing con­di­tion, if you know what I mean.

      Reply

Leave a Reply