How’s it going? Good, good. Listen, there’s something I want to discuss with you. Apparently, some of you were planning to amass at a downtown mall in Toronto for something called a “$5 EATON CENTER APPROACH MARATHON”. The event has since been cancelled due to outrage and common sense – yay for human rights! Because really, events like this demean us all.
The event apparently involved “beasting” which is defined as “approaching [women] continuously and consistently - targeting every approachable set in the vicinity” [italics mine]. It was organized by a Meetup.com group that calls itself Toronto Pick Up Artists (PUAs). (There’s a hyphen missing from there, but bad grammar is the least of their problems.) A bunch of men were going to congregate in the Toronto Eaton Centre and basically harass women who just want to do their Christmas shopping. The Toronto PUAs Meetup.com page has disappeared (sad, because it was so stupid-funny to read) but Toronto Life documented some of the foolishness (albeit in a too-lighthearted way, IMHO, like these guys were some clumsy Pepe le Pews.) Behold:
Since there are so many women in the Eaton Centre you can easily warm up and get yourself into state within 20 minutes. Eaton Centre is therefore a great first stop on your day game iternary. [sic] Do a few approaches there and you can move to other venues which may have less women but better logistics (girls who are stationary).
Okay, guys, listen. This is bullshit. You don’t have to do this. I know that dealing with the opposite sex can be daunting. It happens to women, too, but on top of that add a dollop of insecurity and fears that stem from shit we get fed from lady mags, religion, laws, the entertainment industry — PRETTY MUCH EVERYWHERE. Slut-shaming, “legitimate rape”, normal-sized models who are “plus size”, rape culture (oh, it exists I WILL DEBATE YOU FOR HOURS ON THIS DON’T GET ME STARTED), can’t wear pants because thighs rubbing…
So, I get it. The fear of rejection, of being ridiculed, of feeling not attractive enough — we’ve all been there. For some, self-esteem and confidence comes with age and life experience. For others, it remains a constant struggle. Overcoming insecurity and developing confidence definitely helps with interpersonal relationships. But you don’t get it by joining PUAs or following assholes like this.